


Probably Illegal In Some States

by DoctorV



Series: Archive: Doc's Old-Ass Fake News Fic (Daily Show, Colbert Report, etc.) [16]
Category: Fake News FPF, The Colbert Report, The Daily Show
Genre: Blow Jobs, Crossdressing Kink, F/M, Hand Jobs, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-04-01 03:17:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13989336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorV/pseuds/DoctorV
Summary: "Raven" flirts with Jon. And then some.





	Probably Illegal In Some States

**Author's Note:**

> Archiving some old old OLD fanfic of mine. This was originally posted to LiveJournal 04/15/2009, with the author's note:  
> "Prompt was "How about cross-dressing as a prompt?""

She was tall, that was the first thing Jon noticed. Not an unusual thing for him, to meet women taller than him, but he noticed it anyway.

 

The second thing he noticed was how firm her handshake was. Also, not unusual. But he still noticed it.

 

He also noticed that Raven appeared to be flirting with him. At least he _assumed_ that the well-manicured hand squeezing his ass counted as flirting.

 

Leaning close, breath brushing against his ear as she spoke, Raven murmured, "Let's get out of here."

 

"You got somewhere to be?" Jon asked, brain apparently not catching on after having its supply of blood diverted.

 

Shiny crimson lips slipped into a smirk and a matching crimson nail slid down the front of Jon's shirt. He swallowed thickly. "Uh..."

 

"You got somewhere to _go_?" Raven asked, voice low and sultry.

 

"Fuck yes," Jon breathed.

 

Raven chuckled and offered him her hand, tugging him toward the door as soon as he took it. The trip to Jon's apartment was agonizing but mercifully brief.

 

As soon as they were inside, Raven had him pressed up against the door, dark red lips descending on his with a soft moan. Jon gasped as he felt her hand slide over his crotch, hips jerking toward her touch, and settled his own hands on her slender hips.

 

Movements growing almost frantic, Raven gently bit his lip before dropping to her knees, short black skirt riding up to reveal a tantalizing glimpse of her thighs. She fumbled at his zipper and Jon sucked in a deep breath, staring down at her. Raven's eyes flicked up to meet his and she smirked as she carefully freed his erection. Licking her lips, she dove in, making Jon curse and drop his head back against the door as he was engulfed in warm, wet suction.

 

"Ohhh _fuck_ ," he groaned, trying to still the shallow thrusts of his hips. Raven grabbed his hands and guided them to her thick, dark hair, then used her own hands to hold his hips in place.

 

The things Raven was doing with her tongue were probably illegal in some states, most things that felt that good were. And—"Christ! Oh goddamn." He could _feel_ her chuckling at his reaction to her swallowing around him. He _wanted_ to say something smartassed in response, but god help him all he could do was curse and moan as Raven bobbed her head, sucking and swirling her tongue and driving him _insane_.

 

Jon could feel the pressure building, rushing toward the breaking point, and slipped a hand down to squeeze Raven's shoulder in warning. Raven just tightened her hands on his hips and moved faster, head bobbing, tongue flicking and swirling, and then finally swallowing his release as Jon groaned deeply.

 

Gently letting him slide from her mouth, Raven leaned back with a gasp. Looking down, Jon watched her pant for breath, lipstick a mess.

 

Jon slid to his knees and leaned forward to grab her around the waist and kiss her smeared lipstick. "You're too good to me," he groaned.

 

Laughing breathlessly, Raven snatched one of his hands and pressed it against the bulge in her skirt, pushing up. "Would—Would it ruin things if I took the wig off?" she asked, panting. "It's itchy."

 

Grinning, Jon rubbed at the bulge, thrilled at the moan of pleasure it produced. "I never said no to a woman because she looked a little butch," he said.

 

A whimper escaped Raven and she clumsily slid off the wig of long, dark hair. Underneath, the hair was still dark (with a smattering of grey creeping in), but significantly shorter.

 

Slipping a hand under Raven's skirt, Jon took Stephen in hand and leaned down to kiss him. "Let's take care of _you_ now."


End file.
